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# Posted 12:54 PM by Patrick Belton

NOPE, NO JEWS OVER HERE: Not that England's any less welcome a place to be Jewish than, say, New York, but here is the unabridged text off the container of "Rakusen's Matzos: The big snack, low fat cracker for healthy appetites":

Matzos are ideal for those who prefer low fat diets. With no added salt Matzos can help reduce your sodium intake. Unlike other crackers, Rakusen's Matzos are simply a wholesome blend of fine English wheatflour and pure water. Each matzo is flame-baked in a traditional long oven for just sixty seconds to give them their incomparable crispness and subtle nutty flavour. Plate-sized Matzos contain no added salt or fat, making them a healthy, satisfying snack or lunchtime partner for toppings galore. Matzos - the original cracker that generations have enjoyed.

Note the studious avoidance of any mention of Passover or anything Jewish whatsoever. Nope, no Jews over here, just regular old English people enjoying a wholesome subtle nutty flavour - cheers, mate!

UPDATE: One of our friends wrote in to suggest this was because we hadn't bought the Kosher for Pesach matzos, which have Hebrew on the box. This may well be the case. But given the choice between a true and boring explanation, and an interesting but untrue one, you know which one I'll always pick...

They could change the brand name to something a little less, you know, ethnic, like...

Definitely Not Jewish English Wheatflour and Water Crackers
Rakkossen's Finnish Flatbreads
Gatsby's Best Crackers

- MF, West Virginia

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